I suppose I should really explain why I’ve been on somewhat of a hiatus…
I thoroughly intended to document everything. Everything, as it was happening, to show that no matter how terrible it gets, it’s still possible to come out of it.
Well I still haven’t come out of it. And I fluctuate pretty much daily between “yes, it is still possible” and “nope, not happening, not worth it, not interested.”
For weeks I was thinking how can I write about this? How do I put into words the fear and self-hatred I can feel burning at the back of my throat and stamp a positive message across it? How can I possibly write what is going through my mind-what I’m doing– knowing it confirmed my very worst fears about “getting better?” Continue reading “I’ve had a lot on my plate”